Starring: The Moon, Halle Berry, Patrick Wilson ,John Bradley, Michael Pena, Charlie Plummer, Kelly Yu and Donald Sutherland. Written by Roland Emmerich, Harald Kloser and Spenser Cohen. Directed by Roland Emmerich. Budget $140 million, running time 130 minutes.
The Moon it turns out is not what it seems, and what it is will leave you weeping with laughter.
The plot sees a NASA satellite repair mission destroyed by a mysterious cloud of cgi gubbins, but no one believes Astronut, Patrick Wilson when he tries to tell the world what actually happened. In fact he's ridiculed, loses his job, his marriage, and his friendship with 'mission wife' Halle Berry.
10 years later, Super-structure conspiracy theorist, John Bradley tries to tell the world that the Moon is out of orbit, and guess what no one believes him either. Hmmm, I wonder if these two events are related?
Cue a mad-cap Hail-Marry mission as Berry, Wilson and Bradley set off in a moth-balled Space Shuttle to find out what is causing the Moon to misbehave and that's when it all gets silly, really, really silly.
If you're thinking of going to see Moonfall you need to prepare yourself. Go in with absolutely no expectations and approach it as if it were a Panto. If you do that and are prepared to shout: "THE MOON, IT'S BEHIND YOU!" you have a higher chance of enjoying it, although it's not guaranteed. However, God help you if you go along expecting anything resembling a proper film because you're going to have a wretched time.
This is without doubt the daftest film I have seen in a very long time. In fact it's downright stupid, ridiculous, and staggeringly idiotic. It has no depth, no subtly, and absolutely no redeeming features whatsoever, except for the fact it's relentless, it never lets up, and you're never more than 30 seconds away from another bout of action, mayhem or disaster. It's the movie equivalent of eating a bucket of sweet popcorn, while you're munching fistfuls of it, it's fab, but as soon as it's finished you'll have completely forgotten all about it, and your brain, like your fingers are sticky.
I was amazed to discover that it took three people to write this nonsense, I genuinely thought it was just made up on the spot so to discover that three grown men, with crayons gripped in their little paws actually wrote this was bloody amazing. It's a sorry fall from grace for Roland Emmerich, the man who once gave us the wonderful delights of Independence Day, 2012, and Stargate. Actually he's also the man who gave us 10,000 BC, Independence Day: Resurgence and Shite House Down, so you know, swings and roundabouts.
Never has the phrase, 'It's not big, and it's not clever' been more accurate. The only way this film works is if you treat it like a comedy, but even then you're laughing at it, not with it. Plus it ends with a truly hateful bout of sequel baiting.
Go in expecting a Panto and you might have more fun, otherwise avoid like the plague. Me personally, I laughed and left with a smile on my face, but then I like crappy films.
6/10
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