This 2000 science fiction clunker proves that nothing ages more quickly than early CGI. The effects in this film are very raw and so of their time that they instantly and effectively destroy the film for good. Which is interesting because old special effects with models and blue screen and matts and all those other tricks are not spoiled by the passage of time, actually the opposite is true. Ok, sure some of pre-CGI effects are clunky, but I would argue that those old fashioned special effects have a charm about them that means we forgive them their trespasses, what's more lovely than an old fashioned space ship, with string visible or a travelling matt line?
But in Mission to Mars, the CGI effects are so primitive that all they do is make you realise everything you're looking at is fake and as you lose the ability to suspend disbelief.
The plot sees a mission to Mars go bad and a rescue crew lead by Tim Robbins, his wife, Connie Neilson and Jerry O'Connell sent to save the one remaining astronaut, Don Cheadle. While back at mission control, Gary Sinise experiments with male makeup.
It turns out on Mars, there's this great big alien head waiting for man to open it and receive a message from the Martians who it turns out all fucked off when their world got blitzed by an asteroid, millions of years earlier. Oh and they seeded Earth too.
Also, has no one ever noticed that despite being crap, this film beats 2015's The Martian to the punch by 15 years by having an astronaut marooned on Mars on his own and having to survive using plants and stuff.
It's directed by Brian De Palma with music by Ennio Morricone. And clearly sponsored by Skittles and Dr. Peppers.
Plus the whole film is made horribly jarring by Gary Sinises's black eye liner.
Bollocks.
3/10
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