FILMS OF 2021: FREE GUY, THE SUICIDE SQUAD, WONDER WOMAN 1984 & THE TOMORROW WAR

 FREE GUY

(SPOILER FREE)

Went to the cinema last night, it was a Cineworld secret screening, so no idea what I was going to watch. So, imagine my surprise when Free Guy came on. Directed by Shawn Levy and starring Ryan Reynolds and Jodie Comer. I thoroughly enjoyed this, it was funny, engaging and Reynolds is worth the free admission alone. Plus great to see Jodie Comer in a Hollywood blockbuster.

Imagine Tron crossed with The Truman show and They Live. The plot sees 'Guy' (Ryan Reynolds), an NPC bank teller in a video game set in Grand Theft Auto style world, falling in love with one of the 'Sun Glass Wearers' - real-life players in the game. The story flits between the game and the real world as one of the game players Milli (Jodie Comer) and her game designer friend struggle to find evidence that the game engine is actually theirs and thus stolen by the game company guru Atoine (Taika Waititi).

Engaging, funny, exciting, with a good story, excellent special effects and a satisfying plot.

After The Suicide Squad, this is my favourite film of the year so far.

8/10

The Suicide Squad

At long last the DCU gets it right. And all it took was bringing in the director of Guardians of the Galaxy, ignoring all the other crap films the DCU has puked up and just going for sheer, bloody entertainment.

And I bloody loved this. I was laughing from the off and all the way thorugh. It's profane, insanely violent and utterly stupid. Gunn writes and directs with ease, no violent shaky cam to muddle the action sequences, good CGI and great action beats. And with no saggy boring middle, this film just chuggs along delivering humour and an entertaining plot. The script is packed full of gags, funny dialogue all delivered by a great cast including Idris Elba, Margot Robbie, John Cena, Violet Davis, Peter Calpadi, David Dastmalchian and Michael Rooker. Plus Sylvester Stallone. Indeed everyone seems to be in on the fun.

The plot sees the Suicide Squad sent on a mission that quickly spirals into bat shit crazy daftness and a villain worthy of their attention.

After the dreadfulness of Wonder Woman 1984 and the diabolical shitfulness of the first Suicide Squad this was such a relief to watch and I can't remember the last time I laughed so much at a film.

However, this is an incredibly violent film, and it's a 15 for a reason.

I loved it. Hope you do too.

8/10

Wonder Woman 1984

Yeah, yeah I know I'm late to the party. But I've been waiting for it to come down in price and today in Morrison's it was on sale for £7 and I thought, '£7, that's cheaper than a cinema ticket, I'll give it a go.'

Well...

Two and a half hours later, cos that's how long modern films now take to tell a story, which if you're interested is half an hour longer than Superman 2, which also dealt with its hero giving up their powers for someone they loved, but in a far, far better way.

Why can't modern films tell a compelling story in under 2 and a half hours any more? My heart sank when I checked the timer and realised I still had an hour and 40 minutes to go.

There's just too much story, crammed into the 151 minutes of screen time this film took to finally drag its boring carcass across the finishing line. Every minute filled with angst-filled, Olympic-moping, and so, so much earnest guff, waffle, chit-chat, exposition, and tedious pointless dialogue that did nothing to propel the plot.

And with obligatory action beats shoe-horned into the talking every half hour or so, just to stop the audience from dozing off through boredom - from an early thwarted heist, to a ridiculous invisible jet, to a desert motorway chase and the incredibly damp final showdown, this film had literally none of the charm, excitement or vim of the original. And I literally had no idea what the hell Max Lord wanted or was up to for nearly all of the film's bloated running time up until the introduction of the third act's MacGuffin when his plan finally made some vague sense.

And featuring a final showdown and ending that felt more Doctor Who than DCU.

All that said, this did start well with a trip back to the land of Themyscira, but that quickly becomes a distant fond memory when we're dragged kicking and screaming into the wacky world of 1984, where the film quickly gets bogged down in Max Lord farcical plan. As villains go, Max Lord is useless offering WW nothing to get her teeth or lasso into, since all he does is talk.

Kirsten Wigg offered up a far more interesting character in the guise of Barbara Minerva, who is done a dis-service in the final act when she has to become The Cheetah just so WW has someone to fight, before one more very long-winded chat-down with Max Lord

BTW, Minerva is the most interesting character in the film and so it comes as a complete letdown of her character when at one critical point in the film, her role is suddenly reduced to nothing more than a simpering female sidekick when WW turns up to mansplain a major plot point to her.

And don't get me started on the staggering creepy explanation of the return of Steve Trevor, which if you think about it is very icky in the extreme.

But the most annoying plot contrivance in the entire film is the embarrassing and sudden introduction of the President of the United State's top secret MacGuffin - in the guise of a device that can access any broadcast device in the world - which is just awful. This is introduced to the story in the same way as a plot device in an 1980s kid's animated TV Show with the plans of the device literally mounted on display boards in the background of the Oval Office.

And how the hell does Gal Gadot manage to convey the sense that she's sick to death of the character of WW after just one movie? And why the hell does every superhero movie have to be about the world being devastated or destroyed, what's with all this goddam end of the world shit? Can't we just have a superhero film where just a city is threatened or something?

Normally at this point I'd whinge that I'll never get the 151 minutes of my life back, but this time I'm going to thank the heavens I only wasted £7 on this, rather than the £25 it would cost me to take my family to be disappointed by this in the cinema.

I really enjoyed the first WW film, well apart from the final battle with the God of War, but this film will be making its sweet way to CEX first thing in the morning when I can trade it in for 10p.

4/10

And the introduction of Linda Carter in the post credit extra was just offensive.

The Tomorrow War

What a lazy, half arsed mish-mash of a film. Stealing from Starship Troopers, Live, Die Repeat and The Thing to name but a few. This features some of the worst telegraphing I have seen in a long while. The film feels as if the entire third act was just bolted on due to bad early previews. Creature design is poor and the plot holes many. And I am so bored by the trope of killing monsters by endlessly shooting them to literal pieces.

This is not a terrible film, it's all the above but it still has its moments of fun, sadly it rushes interesting plot points and stretches credulity but hey, it's a film about an invading alien attack, so you know cut it some slack, Jack.

I went along with it, because I liked the set up in the beginning. And I liked the father/daughter dynamic and I also loved Sam Richardson, who sadly is reduced to one of the fore-mentioned telegraphing roles.

I'd give it a half-hearted 5/10.